Moki’s Law

“Moki’s Law” – e-Hawaii Joke

Moki’s Law: The chance of you dividing a manapua evenly in half depends upon how much you want to share it.

Moki’s Law: The syrup in your shave ice will always run out before the ice.

Moki’s Law: Never insult a person who is hairier than you or named Manny.

Moki’s Law: Rugby is the Samoan form of therapy.

Moki’s Law: Never talk to haoles in pidgin, they may try to answer back.

Moki’s Law: When all else fails, say you’re a tourist.

Moki’s Law: Clouds always have a way of following you to the beach.

Moki’s Law: A luau is when pig is served and made of oneself.

Moki’s Law: In Hawaii the extended family could include half the islands.

Moki’s Law: The best waves for surfing will always break while you’re in school or at work.

Moki’s Law: The poi dog you got free from a friend will always be smarter and cuter at their house.

Moki’s Law: If you think you’ve got it bad, try being a tourist stranded at Waimanalo Beach Park.

Moki’s Law: The only good pigeon is one that can’t fly higher than our head.

Moki’s Law: There is always one more cockroach.

Moki’s Law: Be wary of a Hawaiian who says he lives in Kahala but got a District Exception to Nanakuli.

Moki’s Law: The ume will always be in the last corner of the musubi.

Moki’s Law: The Kim Chee you ate three days ago will always resurface while you’re on that important date.

Moki’s Law: Just when you think you’ve met the girl of your dreams, her five older brothers tell you otherwise.

Moki’s Law: The guy you’re crazy about will always ask you out on a night you have to go to a family gathering.

Moki’s Law: In Hawaii the legal age for drinking is 18 and the legal height

Moki’s Law: If you buy a new dress for a party, the chances are that someone else at the party was also shopping at LH.

Moki’s Law: If an invitation says dinner at 6 PM (Hawaiian time) you can safely assume they mean 7:30 PM.

Moki’s Law: Formal in Hawaii is a long sleeve T-shirt with rubber slippers that don’t smell.

Moki’s Law: When in doubt talk pidgin, when in trouble talk Hawaiian.

Moki’s Law: When there’s a long line at Spats and you want to impress your date, the doorman you know will have called in sick.

Moki’s Law: The chance of you losing the top of your shave ice is directly proportional to how long the line was.

Moki’s Law: On the day you start your diet, someone will bring a bag of malasadas to the office.

Moki’s Law: The best way to catch up on old friends, is to shop weekly at Longs.

Moki’s Law: The page you need in the public telephone booth will always be missing.

Moki’s Law: The prerequisites for the Honolulu Police Department are a 4-year varsity letter, a Portuguese last name and healed acne scars.

Moki’s Law: Whoever invented saimin must have also invented spam.

(Submitted via email by “David”)

More from e-Hawaii Staff

Help Da Kanaka

“Help Da Kanaka” – e-Hawaii Joke Keoki is in bed with his...
Read More