“Poor Kimo the Dog” – e-Hawaii Joke
A tita goes to the house of her boyfriend’s parents for dinner. She’s meeting the family for the first time and is kinda nervous-like. They all sit down and start to eat real ono kind luau food. Lau lau, lomi salmon, dried aku, poke, squid luau, and poi. However, she starts to feel a little discomfort, thanks to nervousness and the squid luau with da sour poi. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty little fart. It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard the “poot”.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend’s father looked over at the dog who stay moi moi next to her feet and said in a rather stern voice, ” Kimo!”
The tita thought, “Eh, ‘dis is great!” and one big smile wen come across her face.
A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again. Auwe! Dis time she nevah hesitate. She wen let one rip louda and longa.
The father again looked at the dog and yelled, “Dammit Kimo!”. Once again the tita let out one big smile and thought, “Hoo yea, fa’ out!”
A few minutes later, the tita had to let a noddah one go. Dis time she nevah even think about it. She let rip a fart that rivaled a whistle of a freight train hauling sugar cane through Waianae.
Finally, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, “Godfonnit Kimo, get away from her before she sh*ts all ovah you!”
(Submitted via email by “Clinton”)