“Chinese 101 Exam” – e-Hawaii Joke
| 1. We have reason you are hiding a fugitive | a. Hu ya hai ding | |
| 2. Approach me | b. Shai gai | |
| 3. Stupid fellow | c. Tai ni po ni | |
| 4. Inquiry to determine if bus is due | d. Ni ahn | |
| 5. Oriental swindlers | e. Ai ban mai ni | |
| 6. Not very good | f. Kum hia | |
| 7. Small horse prices are too high here | g. Tai ni bei bi | |
| 8. Premature infant | h. Wai so dim | |
| 9. I would reconsider your purchase | i. Hip sing ur | |
| 10. Crowning achievement of U.S. space program | j. Ten ding ba | |
| 11. Lighting used for advertising | k. Hu rang er lee | |
| 12. I left a call for 9 o’clock and it’s only 8 o’clock | l. No bai dam ting | |
| 13. Cigarettes are dangerous to your health | m. Wa Shing kah | |
| 14. One who serves drinks to people | n. Jah ni ka sun | |
| 15. You trying to save electricity? | o. Hu flung dung | |
| 16. He was a late night show talk host | p. Chin to fat | |
| 17. Bashful man | q. Dum gai | |
| 18. Vocalist with jazz band | r. Moon lan ding | |
| 19. I bumped into a coffee table | s. Hao long wei ting | |
| 20. Which one of you fertilized the field? | t. Lao zi | |
| 21. Cleaning automobile | u. No tsmo king | |
| 22. Have you considered a face lift? | v. Khan men | |
| Answer Key: 1-a, 2-f, 3-q, 4-s, 5-v, 6-t, 7-c, 8-g, 9-l, 10-r, 11-d, 12-k, 13-u, 14-j, 15-h, 16-n, 17-b, 18-i, 19-e, 20-o, 21-m, 22-p. | ||
“Doc, I had one terrible dream last night,” said Kimo to his Psychiatrist. “I wen dream dat I wen die and wen go to see da braddah in heaven, and he told me dat if I’d never cheated on my wife I could drive a luxury car around heaven forever! But he said if I wen cheat on her one time, I had to drive one mid-size car forever, and if I wen cheat on her twice, I had to drive a compact car, and if I wen cheat on her tree times, I had to drive one sub-compact, and if I’d cheated …”
(Submitted via email by Dennis)
